Let's Talk About It #2 - Girls, Bodies, Race & Ignorant Clichés

I'm really loving this series already so many things I have to get off my chest and this is one of them...

One thing I absolutely cannot stand is complete and utter ignorance.

Throughout the short number of years I have spent on this earth, one of the things that's been regularly thrown at me is body image. Even more so when I started secondary school. I remember comparing the body I had to all the other girls' bodies around me. Comparison really is a thief of joy because it just left me dispirited.

What stressed me out even more was the constant change of social expectations. At first it was

slim and trim

, now suddenly it's

slim thick

. Being a black girl apparently I'm expected to be curvaceous in the "right places" with a big butt. I'm told that latinas and hispanic girls have "amazing bodies". I see posts like "people be sleeping on asian girls". Then there are comments about white girls not even having what is considered to be a "good body." ALL of those things are just ignorant clichés. I see skinny black girls. I see white girls with big butts... How do you even generalise a group of people like that?

Whenever I am on twitter everyday it's "girls from this country have the best bodies" or "girls from this country are pretty but their bodies don't bang". My head is honestly just left spinning. Take Brazil for example. When people think about girls from Brazil 9 times out of 10 I'm sure the girl that is pictured is fair lady with long hair and very curvaceous. When you actually go to Brazil you see a wide range of people. Not everybody looks the same which is why I say such generalizations are ignorant.

I, myself don't have the features that a black girl is apparently supposed to have. I have a condition called Kyphoscoliosis which is a combination of 'Kyphosis' and 'Scoliosis'. These are two different forms of curvatures of the spine. I don't like to use the word "deformity" but when it boils down to it, that's what it is. Therefore I don't have what is considered to be a normal body shape. I always wanted to have the corrective surgery so I could look like the other girls, but I've been told that I shouldn't even consider it because the chance of me ending up paralysed is too high.  That's why it annoys me when I see posts with the caption

"black girl magic"

and all the girls look the same. Last time I checked I have black girl magic too but I don't look like that. If we're going to even begin to discuss having more representation in the media that should include EVERYONE that falls under that banner, not just a certain few within it. We need people that all should be able to relate to. It breaks my heart when some of my friends speak to me in disgust about their bodies. Sometimes I've even overheard young girls on the bus insulting another girl that they spotted just because she doesn't fit what they've been brainwashed into believing is the ideal shape.

I've been told on numerous occasions that

I don't need to have a big butt or curves because I have big breasts and boys will want me for that.

Why should I only be loved because of what is sitting on my chest? Why not for who I am as a person? I know many people can relate. I understand the media can be a big influence but we can't just keep blaming the media for our thought patterns. We have to take responsibility for what we choose to accept and reject as the truth. It's such a shame because upon doing my research I found that in the US, according to the American Society of Plastic Surgeons, their 2016 report shows that 17.1million people had undergone some sort of cosmetic procedure. According to the British Association of Aesthetic Plastic Surgeons 51,000 Brits underwent surgical cosmetic procedures and even more non-surgical. Don't get me wrong I'm not here to bash anybody who has or who wants to undergo cosmetic surgery but it really does go to show how much we absorb from the media. I mean look at the statistics for America and in my opinion (correct me if I'm wrong), American media throws body image and just image in general in your face more than any other country.

GUYS IT'S TIME TO WAKE UP! 

Personally, I believe we should think before we speak. Stop with the ignorant generalizations. Be more understanding. More accepting. Let people live peacefully. Refrain from coming up with these foolish expectations and expecting people to reach those false standards. Associating what someone should look like according to their race is just idiocy. When will we learn to just let people be?

Dear Reader,

Your body is yours. Nobody else's. You have to wake up with it each day. You're head is the one that is attached to that body of yours. So please just own it. Accept it. Love it. Your body is beautiful regardless. Don't let any old silly billy tell you differently.

Yours Truly,

Tanesha

I'm not even sure if anything I've said even makes sense. Plus there's so much more I could say about this topic but honestly, I actually don't know how to put it into words.

Thanks for reading x